Forgiveness for ourselves and others can be a challenge for most. While we might offer forgiveness to others we never muster the grace to forgive ourselves. If you don’t forgive yourself then how can you be a complete person or good partner? I am not talking about forgiving yourself for cutting in front of someone else. I am talking about the dark shit that has impacted your life, shaped the direction of your life, held you back or even the crap your nightmares are made of.
Learning to grant yourself forgiveness for those things will free you to go after the person you were meant to be.
Be Strong ~ Be Fearless ~ Be Forgiven
11 steps to help you on your way to forgiveness:
- Learn yourself and your emotions. Only when you truly know your own mind will you be able to walk down the path of true forgiveness. What I mean is if you pretend or try to not get messy then you aren’t addressing the ugly crap or forgiving the things that are holding you back.
- Journal, video tape, blog, talk out loud or whatever your thing is, do it. Acknowledge the mistakes outlaid or writing. Write out why you feel you need to be forgiven and then how forgiveness will change your life.
- Learn and gain experience from your mistakes and things you need forgiveness for.
- Feel free to go back many times if needed to address a mistake or time in your life. It isn’t a race, finish at your own pace.
- We all have those inner voices that say crappy things to us. Our own worst critics. Learn the patterns of that voice. Such as when it makes its debut and when it shuts up.
- Journal about when the voice/critic gets the worst. What is being said?
- Tell it to shut the hell up!!! And Mean it.
- Define what you want and start working out steps to get there.
- Learn your own patterns. If a certain situation makes you act a certain way and you don’t like it. Don’t put yourself in the situation over and over.
- It is natural to go back to the self defeating talk and ways that got you feeling like this in the first day. Be it a bad day or set back. it is easy to go back to the self hate that is so comfortable. Instead, try something new.
- Grace, compassion and love. Here is the kicker. Show these emotions to yourself! Often!!!